All in all, yesterday was a good day. I've managed to keep my emotions out of the equation and we had a sociable get together. My husband was pleasantly surprised with the leek pie and the cake was eaten to the last crumb. Today is a day of rest and recovery of the emotional roller coaster which I've been riding for the last couple of days.
My card for today is the Three of Spirals from the Chrysalis Tarot by Tony brooks and Holly Sierra. Again a fitting card for me. Look at how the head of the Buddha statue is held by the tree. It looks as if it's been there for such a long time. The three has folded himself around it over the years. This card is about slowing down and contemplating your next move. Really assessing where you are and where you want to go next. It is time to ask yourself: What do I really want?
For me this card also symbolizes that, in order to become one with everything around you, you have to lose yourself (ego) first. This can be so scary at times because you have to let go of the illusion of control. I begin to experience this little by little while meditating. Only fractions of moments I feel utterly free of self and connected to everything around me, only to get pulled back again in me. But this tugging and pulling is of such gentle kindness that is also teaching me not blame myself for “failure” and except what is.